The routine I hate.

I don't mind routines. We have lots of them throughout the day. I guess that figuring out systems with babies is key to getting through the day so routines naturally develop.

There is one routine though that I really dislike. Hate is a strong word but I am inclined to use it in this case.

Most of the time, Hugo falls asleep while breastfeeding. I then delicately place him in his cot where he usually rolls over and sleeps soundly.

I like that routine but sometimes it doesn't work and so the dreaded routine comes in. This is how it goes:

Hugo feeds for a while and then, for whatever reason, instead of falling asleep, he'll spring back up and start crawling all over me. I try to get him back to business but to no avail. Since it is naptime, I gently put him down in his cot, give him his teddy bear, crank the volume on his sleeping music, give him a kiss and leave the room.

He knows what is about to happen and from the moment I place him in bed, he starts looking panicked until I leave. Then, the real tears begin.

Within seconds, he is standing in the corner of his cot, crying out for me or whoever else will rescue him from the horrible fate of having to nap. If only he was aware of the irony...

At that point, I never know what to do and all the "bad mother" vs "good mother" rhetoric starts spinning around in my head.

Should I go in and pat him even though I know it won't put him to sleep? Should I just go do the dishes and wait until he falls asleep? He's bound to fall asleep eventually, right? Define 'eventually'...

Usually, when the crying gets more intense and he is still firmly standing in the corner, I go in and feed him. By that point, he is so exhausted from crying that he falls asleep within minutes.

I hate it because it feels like a cruel game to let him cry until he is exhausted enough to feed and fall asleep. I wish it didn't have to be so dramatic but I honestly don't know what else to do short of letting him literally cry himself to sleep.

When we come back from our Christmas expedition to France, I think it might be time to devise a plan. Until then, I'll just be glad he doesn't hold grudges.

9 months: as long out as in.

9 months is such an eternity. A friend of mine, who fell pregnant around the time of Hugo's birth is just about to have a baby. Any day now. It's strange and funny to think that we have both been counting the weeks, her with her bulging belly and me, with my growing baby.

We have both come a long way already but it keeps going. Soon, my friend will find it hard to believe she was ever pregnant as she cradles her newborn and Hugo will keep moving on, leaving his current exploits behind without a second thought.

Everyday, I watch Hugo in amazement as he teaches himself the next variation, from his worm-like hopping to crawling to standing to cruising and on and on. He isn't interested in marking any moment in time. He isn't interested in looking back. I sometimes wonder how he knows what to do next. As much as I can, I let him figure things out and he does, slowly and doggedly.

The only time he stops is when he is asleep. It's not always easy to get him there and most of the time, I still feed him to sleep. Once he is asleep, it is so beautiful and peaceful. His naps are quite long at the moment, a well-deserved rest before the next round in his busy little life. He still has two naps a day and they are as vital to him as food and water.

I am almost certain that while there is a genetic element to it, Hugo's calm, easy-going and happy disposition has a lot to do with our peaceful routine day after day. I feel that my job is to organise the universe to minimise interferences with Hugo's needs. Putting him first actually makes my life easier because he is a lot more predictable and meltdowns are few and far between.

My Mum and step-Dad visited us for about 10 days and of course, it went wonderfully. Obviously there is the amazing practical side of having six hands on deck rather than two during the day but more than that, I love the idea of people getting to really know Hugo. With strangers, he doesn't give much away. He doesn't cry but it takes him a little while to get comfortable, laugh, play etc... which is why it's so special when Chris and I aren't the only ones who see Hugo behind-the-scenes.

Last week-end, we celebrated my 31st birthday amongst friends. There was breakfast, cake, music, sushi by the beach. The only thing missing was a sleep-in but you can't have everything. The low-key celebrations brought back memories of last year's festivities. The people haven't changed much but I was the pregnant one then. This year, it seems that just as I regain my pre-pregnancy figure, it is time for some of my close friends to pop. Funny to imagine where we might be in another 9 months...

GIF fun.

I always take several photos of the same thing so I've been wanting to make some GIFs for a little while. Here we go. I have a feeling I'll be making more of these.

8 months whirlwind!

8 months old! (still no teeth but a good handful of Daddy's hair)

Well, another month bites the dust. Despite my best intentions to write on this blog more often, and not only as each month flies by, I just haven't made or found the time for it. Instead, I must have been keeping a close eye on Hugo as he propels himself into every corner of our apartment.

I was joking recently that watching Hugo at the moment feels a little like watching an episode of Benny Hill. His little legs frantically pushing him this way and that, up, down and around in what seems like a constant fast forward motion. The days of sitting back and keeping a watchful but distant eye on him are well and truly over. I wouldn't say that I rush in to save him from every bump and tumble but it has definitely become a lot more hands on.

Before I launch into a description of what happened to our little man over the last few weeks, I wanted to make a point of also mentioning what is happening in our grown up world. This blog can after all serve as a record of both Hugo's development and ours.

Chris has been busy with work while still having Mondays off. I must admit that it has been wonderful for him to spend more time with us and while we will welcome the security of going back to a real full time, I will definitely miss having him around for that little bit of extra time each week. No word yet on when that might happen but we are guessing that it could switch back early next year.

In his small amount of spare time, Chris has been doing his surf lifesaving bronze medallion, learning how to rescue people caught in the surf, first aid techniques, signals, etc... This means that he will be donning the classic yellow and red uniform and patrolling the beach this summer. So in case you ever wonder what Chris does, just remember that he now 'saves lives' although we hope he never actually needs to. Strutting on the beach is one thing, resuscitation is another.

Meanwhile, I continue to carve out little bits of time to do some paid work, mostly social media and copywriting assignments. The stress of finding the time and energy to do the work is usually balanced out by the enjoyment it procures. Some days, I wish I just didn't need to worry about it while others, I wish I could do a lot more of it. In any case, I feel very lucky and happy I was able to set myself up to work in this way while enjoying Hugo's company as much as possible. At this stage, I still feel I would regret putting him in daycare too soon so for now, we are all satisfied with the arrangement.

I have been going to yoga twice a week for a few weeks now after many months of weekly sessions. I am so glad I am able to and enjoy every moment of it. I also love feeling my body shift back to how it used to be. It feels a little like having an old friend back and I love it. Going to yoga has also turned out to be a great source of friendships, easy laughter and precious relaxation. Taking the time to step away from Hugo for a couple of hours each week and do something for me seems essential at this stage. By the time I get home feeling all refreshed, I usually can't wait to open the door and see my two boys.

Our household has been very happy and relaxed lately which can be majorly attributed to how significantly Hugo's sleep has improved, and therefore ours. About a month ago, we attempted a little bit of 'sleep training'. Hugo was waking two or three times each night and out of convenience, we had fallen into the habit of feeding him every time. When that became too exhausting, we decided to try and change this habit so for a few nights, between the hours of 11pm and 5/6am, Chris would go and get Hugo back to sleep without a feed. To our delight, after only a couple of rough nights, Hugo started sleeping much longer stretches, sometimes even sleeping right through the night. Since we have so far been spared the usual disturbances caused by teething and colds, our nights have become much more restful.

It's difficult to know what impact eating solids might be having on him but he has certainly taken to it with gusto. We have been following the baby-led weaning approach (the baby feeds himself from foods placed in front of him rather than being spoon-fed) which seems to be working out really well. Just as we were starting to introduce solid foods, I came across someone's blog post on this technique and maybe it was just a right time, right place kind of thing but it inspired me to try it, and since it has just felt right.

At the moment, we feed him three meals a day and in just a matter of weeks, he has gone from something one might describe as food 'exploration' to a much more purposeful technique. In the course of a day, he might eat 15 different things, from cereal, yoghurt and fruit, to tofu or scrambled eggs, cheese, meat as well as rice cakes with cream cheese or almond butter, tuna, pasta, green vegetables and so on... It's wonderful and so funny to watch him work his way around such a variety of shapes, textures and tastes, learning how not to squash a banana when holding it to sucking all the juice out of an orange quarter or a slice of juicy beef.

All these extra sources of vitamins, proteins and iron must be going straight into his muscles because Hugo is a man on a mission to move. From the moment he wakes until the second he falls asleep, he is like an Energiser Bunny, crawling, swivelling, rolling, climbing and his latest and most impressive, standing which he now does obsessively and a little compulsively. This morning, I watched him as he found himself at a metaphorical crossroad. In one direction, he could chase a ball and in the other, he could lift himself up to stand at the coffee table. He looked both ways a couple of times and eventually, the urge to stand too strong to resist, he chose the latter.

The only problem with his new found ability and that he hasn't quite figured out how to get down so the poor thing will stand, holding on for dear life until his little legs are shaking under his weight. Usually, if we aren't there to help him, he topples backwards landing in a big thud followed by loud cries. The cries never last and since we have carpet, he doesn't really hurt himself. I'm sure it won't take him long to work it out though which will be a wonderful milestone for him. In the meantime, every time he wakes up from a nap or in the middle of the night, we can be certain we will open the door to find him standing in his cot, grinning from ear to ear and chatting to himself. I have tried but so far I have failed to find anything cuter than that!

Wow, this is quite a novel so it might be time for a few photos before calling it a day and getting stuck into some work. In no particular order...

First time sitting (almost) by himself. A few weeks later, he can stand!