As our children get older, my friends and I have all stepped into a playground etiquette minefield and I think we are all struggling a little bit with it.
There was a sort of golden period with some of Hugo's friends when they had made up their little games and played really well together. I feel that Hugo hasn't changed too much but his friends seem to be a little ahead of him in terms of displaying some difficult behaviours, mostly to do with sharing.
Toddlers are possessive, they snatch and pull and push. They cuddle without consent, topple each other over, refuse to play together, scream and once in a while, hit each other.
Although all of it is normal and harmless, it's still uncomfortable when an innocent looking game ends in tears for no reason or someone accidentally gets hit by a stick wielded by an overly enthusiastic child (that could be Hugo).
I find that I tend to be on the low panic end of the spectrum and I try not to overreact if Hugo has a little tumble or has a toy snatched from his hands. His get-up-and-get-over-it attitude certainly helps in keeping things nice and calm but I do sometimes wonder if other parents get annoyed with him or if they are just stressed trying to manage their own children.
This sort of stuff starts to take the fun out of some outings. Sometimes, although I think Hugo isn't causing any problems, I'll still start to plan our departure just to remove us from the situation. The mood can change quickly with toddlers and you just have to be quick on your feet before every one hits a wall.
It isn't an aspect I really enjoy but I don't think any of us do. As long as it's just the kids getting into scuffles, then we're alright.
There was a sort of golden period with some of Hugo's friends when they had made up their little games and played really well together. I feel that Hugo hasn't changed too much but his friends seem to be a little ahead of him in terms of displaying some difficult behaviours, mostly to do with sharing.
Toddlers are possessive, they snatch and pull and push. They cuddle without consent, topple each other over, refuse to play together, scream and once in a while, hit each other.
Although all of it is normal and harmless, it's still uncomfortable when an innocent looking game ends in tears for no reason or someone accidentally gets hit by a stick wielded by an overly enthusiastic child (that could be Hugo).
I find that I tend to be on the low panic end of the spectrum and I try not to overreact if Hugo has a little tumble or has a toy snatched from his hands. His get-up-and-get-over-it attitude certainly helps in keeping things nice and calm but I do sometimes wonder if other parents get annoyed with him or if they are just stressed trying to manage their own children.
This sort of stuff starts to take the fun out of some outings. Sometimes, although I think Hugo isn't causing any problems, I'll still start to plan our departure just to remove us from the situation. The mood can change quickly with toddlers and you just have to be quick on your feet before every one hits a wall.
It isn't an aspect I really enjoy but I don't think any of us do. As long as it's just the kids getting into scuffles, then we're alright.
It's an amusing coincidence that your post comes just after I read a paper on Empathy for an Early Childhood Education class.
ReplyDeleteThe paper suggested that empathy is demonstrated/taught by parents/caregivers and I was reminded of how I observed NY parents teaching sharing and gentle behavior at the playground while nicois parents at their playground were more preoccupied with teaching their children to defend themselves against other children.
The NY parents urged their toddlers to share their toys while the nicois parents wouldn't even let theirs borrow other toddlers' toys, much less offer their own!
The paper gives the example of Japan where empathy is seen as a value essential to the good of society.