(Update: Since writing this post, I have emailed all the pre-schools around us enquiring about putting Hugo's name down for a start next year. I am by no means trying to push him out but I want things to be in place for when he is ready to explore new horizons.)
The trouble with holidays is that they shine a bright light on the dullness of normal life with its routines, logistics and long lonely days. This week has been a little tough and judging by Hugo's fairly constant wingeing, I might not be the only one feeling the sting of reality setting back in.
I can't blame Hugo for feeling a little hard done by this week. Despite my best efforts to take him to the park or the beach, to organise play-dates with his buddies and to play together at home, the excitement levels have dropped significantly. It doesn't matter what I do, our days together are a bit dull, my patience, energy and resources are all limited and well, I get a bit bored too.
Yesterday afternoon, Hugo woke up from his nap around 4pm so I decided to just stay at home rather than go out at the end of the day when it gets cold and dark. I miss having nice times at home and what I picture is Hugo keeping himself entertained with his millions of toys and books while I potter around. I don't even need to do something nice but just peacefully hanging the laundry or starting dinner would be fine by me.
Instead, Hugo follows me around like my shadow, except whinier. Every time I take a step, he takes one right behind me and if by some miracle, he starts playing with something on his own, he stops and follows me the second I get up to leave the room. All of this is abundantly accompanied by fake crying and wailing. He's like some sort of dizziying satellite around an increasingly annoyed planet.
Is it an age thing? Or am I doing something completely wrong?
It better be his age because I honestly don't know how to make things more exciting for him otherwise. I am really hoping that over the next few months, he will gradually become more enthralled by his own games. I also fantasise about a time when Hugo and Eloise can play together but I'm sure that this will come with its fair share of drama too.
The real problem here isn't Hugo or even me, it's that it's only ever just us. Last week, he had loads of people to play with and I had plenty of people around to chat with. Time just went quicker and we got a break from each other and our routines. How can I expect either of us to feel excited about doing the same thing for the millionth time? It's still nice but it loses some of its shine.
I realised the other day that since Hugo was born, more than two years ago, I have had only 3 days on my own when Chris took him to Albury for the week-end. Meanwhile, Chris has NEVER had a single day alone with Hugo. Not one! What's frustrating is that he would definitely enjoy having more time with Hugo and would do very well. Meanwhile, I dream of time alone but it just doesn't happen for either of us. It's a crazy system and no wonder we're all going bonkers!
Sadly, nothing is going to change for a while so I might as well get back into the groove of things. Enjoy this time while I have it. As tough as it is, I know I won't regret it in the long run. And also, we have visitors coming and I can't wait!!
In our uni days, when things got busy, we used to say, "There is beer at the end of the tunnel." I don't even need beer, just a little bit of old-fashioned company will be plenty.
The trouble with holidays is that they shine a bright light on the dullness of normal life with its routines, logistics and long lonely days. This week has been a little tough and judging by Hugo's fairly constant wingeing, I might not be the only one feeling the sting of reality setting back in.
I can't blame Hugo for feeling a little hard done by this week. Despite my best efforts to take him to the park or the beach, to organise play-dates with his buddies and to play together at home, the excitement levels have dropped significantly. It doesn't matter what I do, our days together are a bit dull, my patience, energy and resources are all limited and well, I get a bit bored too.
Yesterday afternoon, Hugo woke up from his nap around 4pm so I decided to just stay at home rather than go out at the end of the day when it gets cold and dark. I miss having nice times at home and what I picture is Hugo keeping himself entertained with his millions of toys and books while I potter around. I don't even need to do something nice but just peacefully hanging the laundry or starting dinner would be fine by me.
Instead, Hugo follows me around like my shadow, except whinier. Every time I take a step, he takes one right behind me and if by some miracle, he starts playing with something on his own, he stops and follows me the second I get up to leave the room. All of this is abundantly accompanied by fake crying and wailing. He's like some sort of dizziying satellite around an increasingly annoyed planet.
Is it an age thing? Or am I doing something completely wrong?
It better be his age because I honestly don't know how to make things more exciting for him otherwise. I am really hoping that over the next few months, he will gradually become more enthralled by his own games. I also fantasise about a time when Hugo and Eloise can play together but I'm sure that this will come with its fair share of drama too.
The real problem here isn't Hugo or even me, it's that it's only ever just us. Last week, he had loads of people to play with and I had plenty of people around to chat with. Time just went quicker and we got a break from each other and our routines. How can I expect either of us to feel excited about doing the same thing for the millionth time? It's still nice but it loses some of its shine.
I realised the other day that since Hugo was born, more than two years ago, I have had only 3 days on my own when Chris took him to Albury for the week-end. Meanwhile, Chris has NEVER had a single day alone with Hugo. Not one! What's frustrating is that he would definitely enjoy having more time with Hugo and would do very well. Meanwhile, I dream of time alone but it just doesn't happen for either of us. It's a crazy system and no wonder we're all going bonkers!
Sadly, nothing is going to change for a while so I might as well get back into the groove of things. Enjoy this time while I have it. As tough as it is, I know I won't regret it in the long run. And also, we have visitors coming and I can't wait!!
In our uni days, when things got busy, we used to say, "There is beer at the end of the tunnel." I don't even need beer, just a little bit of old-fashioned company will be plenty.
This reminds me of when you'd come home from summer sleep away camp where there was constant company and a plethora of ongoing activities. Quiet "downtime" at home was definitely not what you needed.
ReplyDeleteWhen Eloise is a bit older, I expect she and Hugo will be as busy as you and your 25 month younger bro. Not only were you constantly involved in activity but also in a non-stop loop of conversation.
Until then, yes, you will have some long hours of dissatisfaction which some parents would have no qualms about dissipating with their magic wand, the remote control of the boob tube, and which you will punctuate with outings and games, the best you can.
But life can't always be exciting and slow days must be dealt with. Yay once again for France where public pre-school is offered by Hugo's age and parents aren't expected to keep a child at home until age 5 or to pay a fortune for private pre-school.
As I tread the thin line between bemoaning my far away pointless life and enjoying my easy life, I think back on the days when I too yearned for 3 minutes without being asked for something or a complaint free day. They can be draining so it's important to find even small ways to offset them with pleasurable moments but also to understand that they are a perfectly normal part of life.